TARZAN & JANE

Peeking out my living room window, I observed a yellow and white truck with the words “Shorty’s Moving and Storage” on it.  This was my first indication of our new neighbors.

We had been clear of neighbors on one side of us for a few months, and frankly, that was fine with me.  Everyone has had their share of ‘bad’ neighbor tales; me included.  I usually live beside the ones who have dogs that continually bark.   People love to leave their dogs outside while they are out on THEIR errands.  And, it’s everyone else who has to contend with the non-stop barking.  Selfish isn’t it?  Suppose they don’t want the dog to tear apart their furniture or mess on the floors.

• My girlfriend and I were exited by our first apartment, but experienced what sounded like a tap dancing class practicing above us a few times per week.  The noise was incredible and thought the ceiling would collapse during these ‘practices’.  I have no idea what exactly these people were doing up there to make such a noise, but it continued for hours.  Complaining to the upstairs neighbor was useless – our raps on the door would have been unheard.  The super was also useless.  He seemed a fair fellow when we rented the apartment; however, knocking on his door we were met with a man smelling of whiskey and slurring his words “I’ll look into it”.  We put up with it for a few months, but since it luckily was a month-to-month packed up our gear and left.  Not fair that we had to leave, however, it was the tap dancing troupe or us.
• We purchased a house in a small town.  The neighbor who’s backyard backed onto ours (fence separated), had a German Sheppard dog.  This bastard left this poor dog outside 24/7.  The dog barked non-stop; no wonder – it was in the dead of winter.  The SPCA was called numerous times, as well as, the police for the noise.  I’m sure doggie probably peeked through the fence when the SPCA arrived hoping for a rescue from his hell, but that never happened.  Makes me ill just thinking about that dog.  Why even have dogs?  The barking ended and I became worried about the dog; however, another neighbor informed me the dog went to live with the man’s relative.  Hope the dog had a better home at his new surroundings.
• Another apartment we lived in was high priced, yet not very well built due to paper thin walls.  Our next door neighbor’s master bedroom was attached to ours.  Too many nights attempting to fall asleep and trying not to listen to moaning and groaning.  Lots of words like “man”, “wow” and “whoa” became the regular script.  This couple must have been on sexual marathons, possibly practicing for competitions.  They sure put my life to shame!  At times, I envisioned there was the possibility of a Tarzan rope; thus nicknaming this couple “Tarzan and Jane”. 

At times I felt like rapping on their door, yet almost feeling guilty interrupting a session and felt it also useless.  Then one day it all ended.  Either Jane or Tarzan or both of them moved out.  Wow, peace.

I have other dilly neighbor experiences that I have had to live with; some that were extremely annoying, but you get the picture.

As far as these new neighbors go – haven’t really spotted anyone coming or going yet.  Will have to wait and see and I’m definitely crossing my fingers.